What is Stress? Too Much or Too Often

Understanding the Foundations of Stress

Before we can begin to address the issues that stress causes in our lives, it's important to go back to the source and define what we actually mean by stress.

At first glance, this might seem like a simple question with a personal answer. For one person, stress might come from a looming project deadline. For another, it might be the frustration of missing bin collection day. Already, we can see that stress is a deeply subjective experience. One that varies from person to person, and even from moment to moment.

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How We Interpret Stress: Threat vs. Coping

The experience of stress is essentially a balancing act between how threatening we perceive a situation to be, and how capable we feel of handling that threat.

At its core, stress involves two mental questions:

1. Is this situation a threat to me?

2. Can I cope with it?

   
   

This forms what psychologists call threat appraisal and coping appraisal. The balance (or imbalance) between these two determines our level of stress.

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The Three Zones of Stress

• Low Threat / High Coping Ability

  When we feel highly capable and the threat seems small, we’re relaxed. So relaxed, in fact, that we may not even feel motivated to take action — the issue feels too minor to matter.

• Balanced Threat and Coping

  This is the productive stress zone. You feel challenged but capable. Athletes perform best here. You probably do your best work in this zone — just outside your comfort zone but not overwhelmed.

  
  

• High Threat / Low Coping Ability

  When the perceived threat overwhelms your ability to cope, stress becomes distress. This is when people begin to fray — becoming avoidant, emotional, or even incapacitated. This is us beyond our limits.

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The Fight-or-Flight Response: Your Body on Stress

Why do we respond this way? Because of a powerful internal balance between two systems in our nervous system:

• The Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS) – activates our "fight or flight" response.

• The Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS) – promotes "rest and digest."

When the SNS is activated by a perceived threat, your body prepares for action:

• Heart rate increases

• Breathing quickens

• Digestion slows

• Pupils dilate

• Cortisol floods the body

Cortisol helps increase blood sugar levels to fuel physical response, useful in short bursts. But it also impairs memory, concentration, and logical thinking. This is why, after a stressful event, you might struggle to recall details clearly and why, during, we might make decisions we later regret.

The PNS, on the other hand, helps us calm down. It slows the heart rate, restores digestion, and brings the body back to a state of rest and recovery. These two systems work in opposition, regulating our body’s response to the world around us.

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Evolutionary Mismatch: Short-Term vs. Chronic Stress

Here’s the catch, our stress response evolved to handle short-term, physical threats. Think: escaping predators or surviving natural disasters. These intense, short bursts of stress were useful, even healthy.

In the modern world, however, stress has taken on a new form. We rarely face immediate physical danger. Instead, we’re exposed to chronic stressors:

• Financial pressure

• Workplace demands

• Social comparison via social media

• Constant notifications and information overload

This long-term activation of the stress response leads to burnout and breakdown. Chronic stress affects every domain of health: physical, emotional, cognitive, social, spiritual, even our sleep rhythms.

When stress becomes chronic, the once-helpful "fight or flight" system becomes destructive.

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You Don’t Have to Face Stress Alone

Severe or chronic stress can feel overwhelming, even insurmountable. Sometimes, what we need is a safe space and a compassionate ear.

At Volition Therapy, we offer just that.

If you're feeling the effects of stress and think you might benefit from talking it through, get in touch. Book a free, no-obligation chat and see how we can work together to help you manage your stress and find your way forward.